谈谈坐飞机这件事 ?

大部分都旅行。有些人是偶尔,有些人至少一周两次坐在铝管儿里。我们都知道这就其实就是就是把人装进飞机去然后从一个机场到另外一个机场,也不管这些人在飞机上是何种行为举止。

航公公司的公关部门,这是第一次向你们展示乘坐你们航班的一些痛苦经历。
现在正是旅行的高峰时节,应该制作关于“旅行的礼节”小册子。最近旅行中遇到的很多各种举止的乘客,你们的这些顾客绝对没有意识到他们的行为多不好,特别是长途旅行。

可以作为这个小册子显著标题的还有如下——如果我在座位前面的口袋看到这样的小册子我不会觉得被冒犯或者生气。

为了确保航班上所有旅客都有好的旅行体验,如果你能考虑以下内容:

  • 在你旅行开始前,个人卫生是需要执行的一个非常重要的事项。你要和至少100人以上呆在一个相对小的空间内。请不要使用过浓的香水,我也不希望坐在闻起来好像被用了好久的烟灰缸的人旁边。谢谢!
  • 如果你带吃的上飞机,请避免那些可能冒犯他人的有味道的食物——小机舱内特别不适合吃那些味道强烈的食物。我真的不想闻你的比萨。
  • 如果你想坐进你的座位或者从你的座位站起来,请扶你自己的座椅头枕,而不是你前面人的,如果人家想休息这个干扰是非常让人觉得不舒服的。
  • 在狭小的机舱大声聊天是冒犯的行为。请把声音控制在自己的区域内,别人不想知道你们聊天的内容。
  • 如果你在个人电子设备玩游戏,请确保扬声器是关闭或使用你的耳机。10小时飞行的飞机不是让你无所顾忌的开着音箱玩游戏的地方。
  • 确保与你一同旅行的孩子在你的控制下,别有冒犯他人的举止,包括在机舱通道跑来跑去,踢前面乘客的椅子,这些都不能让其他人旅行愉快。
  • 别在其他乘客面前把卫生间前或紧急通道的位置作为和你的小孩儿“聚会”或者“跳舞”的地方,除非他们哭闹不止你没办法,避免渐渐侵占其他旅客地盘的行为。不管你信不信,我下飞机就要赶去开会(所以在飞机上需要好好休息)。
  • 如果你使用在其他旅客区域内的洗手间,在进出时或在洗手间周围避免制造噪音,特别是长途旅行中其他旅客想休息。
  • 如果你的小便超出范围,请清洁。如果没人管这些洗手间在经过长途飞行后变得很难闻。
  • 当你收起小桌板时,请不要砰一声猛收。在这个旅行后,你前面的人脊柱如果还没断他们真得好好谢谢你。
  • 试着限制你座椅倾斜的程度。也就是说“别”。是的,我们知道你可以这样做。但是也可以选择不,放倒座椅也许这是你的权利,但真的限制了你后面人的空间,并引起他们的不适,特别你后面的人超过6英尺(1.8米)。
  • 关于穿什么这显然是个人问题,我们推荐你考虑到是不是冒犯其他旅客然后决定穿什么。大部分你的邻座不希望觉得你好像在他们面前裸着或者感觉露好多肉。
  • 当你到达目的地时,是有下机的秩序的。通常是根据座位号的顺序,从你的位置到下机位置之间的旅客希望在你走之前下机,所以请你等人家离开后才轮到你。
  • 当你落地后手机还是禁止使用的,请关掉声音。飞机上其他旅客不想知道你之后的旅行细节。信不信由你,我对你的性生活根本不感兴趣。
  • 当你在机舱活动时,避免碰到其他旅客,特别是当你拿着行李的时候,穿越机舱时你的行李不应该碰到他人。
  • 当你不坐在通道座位但想离开座位的时候,请允许别人有足够时间整理他们自己的个人状态并让你出去过或进来。如果是长途旅行,请在飞行开始时使用洗手间或者其它机上设施,这样别人如果想休息也不会打扰他们,如果你之前知道自己要频繁出入,请尽量安排通道座位。

肯定还有更多可以总结的,如果你觉得有特别想让我们加上的“不能够”,请联系我们。即使它们是差不多可以感觉到的,我们也会加在这里。不然你怎么就知道未来就会有航空公司决定接收这些建议并放在你们这些旅客身上。

#americanairlines #aa.com #united #united.com #jetblue #alaska #alaskaair #deltaairlines #KLM #lufthansa #emirates #jal #chinaeastern #chinaair

Travel, anyone?

Most of us travel. Some of us travel occasionally, some of us are on that aluminum tube at least twice a week. We all know what it’s like to put up with the grockels that simply have no idea whatsoever when it comes to moving through an airport, or behave themselves in a reasonable manner once on board.

So, #airline #PR departments – this is a first draft of some notes that came from bitter experience on one of your flights.

It is high time that a leaflet is produced that discusses “etiquette for air travel”. The behavior of various travelers with whom I have recently had the displeasure of having to travel with makes it clear that a lot of your customers have absolutely no inkling of how impossible their behavior is, especially during longer flights.

A few noteworthy headings for such a leaflet would be as follows – and I for one would not be offended in any way if these leaflets were to be laminated and inserted into the seat back pocket in front of me:

In order to make sure for a good travel experience for all travelers on this flight, we would appreciate it if you would take the following points into consideration:

  • Before starting on your travels, personal hygiene is an important issue to take care of. You will be with 100+ other travelers in a relatively small space. Please limit the use of strong perfumes, and I’d also rather not sit next to something that smells like a long abandoned ash tray either. Thanks!
  • If you bring food on board, please try to avoid foods that might be offensive to others – strong smelling foods in particular are not suitable for consumption in a small aircraft cabin. I really don’t want to smell your pizza.
  • If you get into your chair, or up from your chair, please use YOUR headrest to lean on – NOT the headrest of the person traveling in front of you, as this is very uncomfortable and if they are trying to rest will disturb them greatly
  • Loud conversations in a small cabin are offensive. Please contain yourself to your own area; other travelers do not want to hear the details of your conversations
  • If you play games on your personal electronic systems, please make sure to turn the sound off or use headphones. A 10 hour international flight is not the place for you to play video games incessantly with the audio turned up. Oh – and no, headphones at level 11 so that I can listen to the high frequencies of your game or music is not necessary; let’s keep it real.
  • Please make sure that children traveling with you are under your control, and do not behave in an offensive manner. Behavior including continuous running through the aircraft corridors, and kicking the chair in front of them are not conducive to a happy travel experience for others.
  • When you have kids on board, do NOT decide to watch the movie with noise canceling headphones on. They’re your kids. You made them. Kindly look after them! (thanks Martin Barratt)
  • Do not use the areas in front of the emergency exits or by toilets in front of other travelers to “hang out” or “dance” with your babies while they are screaming any more than you have to, and try to avoid encroaching into other traveler’s spaces. Believe it or not, I have a meeting to go to the moment I arrive the other end.
  • If you are using a toilet in front of other passengers spaces, please avoid kicking them while getting in or out of the toilets or the space in front of the toilets, especially on longer flights where other travelers are trying to get some rest.
  • If you pee over the edge – clean it up. Those toilets get seriously nasty after a long flight with nobody caring.
  • When you store your food trays please make sure not to slam them. The person in front of you will appreciate it if their spine is still in one piece AFTER this flight.
  • Try to limit reclining your seat. That means “DON’T”. Yes, we know you can. Although the option is there, and it may be your right to recline your seat, it severely restricts the remaining space for those behind you, and may cause discomfort and pain for those seated behind you, especially where they are fellow travelers over about 6’.
  • Although dress code is obviously a personal issue, we do recommend that you consider what you wear so that it cannot be considered offensive to other passengers. Your next door neighbor most likely does not want to feel your naked flesh/flab pressed against them.
  • When you arrive at your destination, there is a normal sequence for disembarkation. This is normally done be row numbers, and people between you and the exit of the plane would expect to leave before you do, so please wait until it is your turn.
  • When you arrive at your destination and cell phone use is permitted, please keep your voice down. The rest of the passengers on this flight do not want to know your travel details or intent for the remainder of the day. Believe it or not, your sex life is of no interest to me. Well, mostly anyway.
  • When you move through the cabin, please make sure to avoid brushing up against other passengers, and be especially considerate with any luggage your are carrying; your luggage should not hit other passengers as you move through the cabin
  • If you need to leave your seat and you are not on the isle, please allow adequate time for the passenger or passengers between your seat and the isle to organize themselves before you try to get in or out. On longer flights, try to use the facilities at the beginning of the flight so that they can get some rest if they wish to do so. If you know you have a more regular need to get up than most, try to arrange for an aisle seat.
  • If you are wearing a backpack, remember that you stick out, so when you turn around, try not to knock the teeth out of the person you are swiping your backpack into. In fact – on an aircraft it makes a lot more sense to CARRY your backpack so that this scenario can’t happen. (thanks George Mayer)

There must be plenty more – so if you feel so inclined to have us add your favorite no-no to the list, please let us know. If it’s halfway sensible, we’ll add it here. You never know, one of the airlines might just decide it’s sensible and ‘suggest’ it to your fellow travelers.

#americanairlines #aa.com #united #united.com #jetblue #alaska #alaskaair #deltaairlines #KLM #lufthansa #emirates #jal #chinaeastern #chinaair